Photo credit: www.troll.me
By SB Independent Staff
Do you ever have one of those days where you walk around campus without a care in the world and you know you’re gonna do whatever you want, just because you can? That’s a thug moment — doing something just because you know you can do it. Here are our staff’s picks for the top 10 thug moments they may have had or seen on campus:
10. Throwing people’s clothing out of the dryer to use it for your own laundry
Six dryers available. Zero empty. The dryer on the corner that shakes violently after someone put their Chucks in after a rainy day has two minutes left on the clock until it is done. One minute left, 30 seconds left, 15 seconds left, 10 seconds left, nine seconds left, eight seconds left, seven seconds left, six seconds left, five, four, three, two, one.
Open the dryer door and toss the girl from 302B’s sweats and sports bras in to the bin on the floor. Like I care what happens next? I waited patiently enough.
9. Working out at the campus recreation center in your jeans
I am an athlete. The basketball players quiver when I walk in the room. The weightlifters shutter at my flex. The boys gawk at my curves. The ladies chatter in jealousy. I do not care if am still dressed in my scrubs from class, last night’s pajamas or my apple-bottom jeans. I will workout when I want, where I want.
So jock, much strength.
8. Walking around naked in the dorm bathroom
Look out gents, Big Papa is coming through. I like to live my corridor dorm life on the edge. Sometimes I even take a trip down the hallway stark nude because I like to feel the breeze in between my knees. Every wondering eye I see is met with a wink.
7. Making the walk of shame through campus on Friday morning with heels and hair extensions in hand
I am still unsure how I got here or where I was 20 minutes ago. All I know is I am still rocking this skintight black dress just as well as I did last night. Got a problem with my hair extensions? Buzz off, I will use them like nunchucks and I know karate.
I am like Charlie’s Angels after hours.
6. Cutting off the girl with crutches to get into the elevator first
I got class, figuratively and physically. It took me an hour and a half to get ready this morning. It is 8:59 a.m. and I got a 9 o’clock. I don’t care if you are the Pope, a woman in labor or a tennis girl with crutches — I am getting on the elevator. Does your professor call for attendance in a class of 200 people like a third-grade teacher, I don’t think so. But mine does.
5. Using the library’s computers to go on Facebook when people are waiting to use a computer for actual school work
Oh you got a term paper due in 20 minutes. Tough luck, Charlotte is telling me on Facebook about this cute guy she met a frat party last night and the pictures just went online. I will get up from this computer when I damn well please.
4. Refusing to get out of bed when the fire alarm goes off
I got a midterm tomorrow. If there is a fire in the building just let it take me now! After all what could be better than dying in bed with my bae: my pillow.
3. Sending passive-aggressive emails to professors
No, I am not going to your office hours. Why? Because I have class at that time. What do you mean, you “will be unavailable to discuss my grade over email?” By the way, Teach: You are an educator, please learn the difference between “there,” “their” and “they’re.”
2. Blasting the car horn when people are walking in the crosswalk
Vehicular manslaughter will get me about eight years in prison. My med track is about eight as well. At least with manslaughter I can get out early on good behavior.
1. Entering and exiting your dorm on the first floor through the balcony instead of taking the front door
I am like Michelle Jenneke of Australia. I hurdle my way in and out of my room and onto the balcony. I am pretty sure I don’t own a key to my dorm anymore.
Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly listicle posted on Wednesday, with entries compiled by the Stony Brook Independent staff at our general body meeting held every Tuesday night at 8 p.m. Interested in hearing our top 10 on a specific subject or idea? Send us a suggestion by clicking the “About Us” tab above.